Starting off with how to tell apart honest people from liars and even more footage from the Jan. 6 Capitol Hill Incident...

Protip: For the tastiest eggplant possible in the least amount of time, put it on a flat surface on its longest side then slice it into half-inch rounds. Don't bother with spreading out the slices or anything like that. Next, put it in the microwave on high for 3 minutes. It helps if you only slice almost all the way through. No need to season it first. Even if it's one of those huge ones that's been on the plant and/or store shelf too long.